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Freedom Friday – On Becoming Small

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Downtown Charleston and Battery Park 062

If I share with you yet another area of weakness will you judge?  Will you think to yourself that I am a terrible leader of people because I don’t have it all together myself?  Today’s Freedom Friday post is yet another lesson I’m learning during this time of becoming more dependent on God to meet my need for friendship.  This is an honest, from-the-heart post that exposes more of the real me.  I hope that you will read and NOT judge . . .

. . . After all, maybe some of you are a bit like me.

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Welcome to FREEDOM FRIDAY – A new devotional, emotional, spiritual and sometimes hysterical series that I will be sharing on occasional Fridays, in addition to my regular Old Things New posts.

As I mentioned in my first Freedom Friday post I’ve been thinking a lot about the concept of Knowing and Being Known.  In that post I shared that I believe God has given me this time of not knowing anyone in our new community so that I will draw closer to Him and spend more time in His Presence . . . knowing and being known by Him.

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Having been Freedom Session Directors for the past four years I can tell you that doing the ministry that God has called one to can be an exciting thing!  Who knew that God would ever be able to use my story to help others?  Life experience brought me low but God intervened and sent people who believed in me, supported me, encouraged me and brought great healing into my life by loving on me without reservation.  In that process I became better, I grew, I changed, and I received such freedom that I wanted to help others.

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In the beginning I could barely stand in front of people with a microphone without shaking in my pretty boots (a feeling that has never fully left me), but in stepping out of my comfort zone, sharing my own story, and offering hope in Christ to others, I’ve been blessed to see many people set free of the shackles that have bound them for years, even as practicing Christians.

When all of the work you pour into a ministry like Freedom Session results in victory in people’s lives it is not only exciting but can be a heady thing!

head·y
ˈhedē/
adjective
 
  1. (of liquor) potent; intoxicating.
    “several bottles of heady local wine”
    synonyms: potent, intoxicating, strong; More

     
       

Each year, as we started up a new year in Freedom Session I would pray this prayer,

prayer of jabez

 And God faithfully answered.

I would also often say, “I want to do BIG things for you God!”

Thinking back I’ve been asking myself what the motives were behind those prayers?

I believe they were mostly good but I wonder, now that I am in a place where I’m not known or recognized at all when I walk into a church . . . when I don’t have people deliberately making their way over to me to give me a hug or an encouraging word . . . when I don’t have people thanking me for teaching a particularly important lesson . . . am I okay with not being known?

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I’m not particularly fond of a lot of public praise or having attention drawn to myself.  In fact it can be quite embarrassing.  This stems from a period of negative attention received in the past.

But being known in a positive way was kinda’ nice.

In this new place of BIG churches I am not REALLY known by anyone.  I’m also not doing BIG things for God!  What I am able to do is spend a lot of time GOING DEEPER with God and I’m finding that this season of going deeper is good, REALLY good!

One of my favorite authors, Ann Voskamp says, “All wonder and worship can only grow out of smallness”.

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In this place of smallness, of being unknown, I lean in to God and He does not disappoint as He pours out His lavish love and affection on me.  In this place of being small I can see how big GOD is to meet all my needs.  As I become small before Him He is magnified and I am comforted.

And I realize that I don’t need to do BIG things or GREAT things for God.  He doesn’t need me to make His name great.  He doesn’t need me to do anything for Him at all. because He is the God of all GREATNESS!

Yet . . .  and this is a big YET. . . as Christ followers we are all called to be a part of the greater story . . . His Story.  Each of our lives are meant to be shared with others to encourage and draw them to Christ. Scripture says that we are chosen and appointed to bear fruit! – John 15:16.

As we play our part in God’s story it is important to remember that our stories shouldn’t make US great but should always point to Christ and His greatness!

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What about you?  Maybe you feel lower than low and you can’t even relate to what I’ve said. Maybe you’ve never had the experience of feeling important to anyone.  In that case, if you are a Christ follower, you need to know who Christ says you are in Him:

  You are CHOSEN – Eph. 1:3-8;  You are God’s workmanship – Eph. 2:10;  You are a new creation – II Cor. 5:17;  You are redeemed and forgiven – Col. 1:13-14;  You are free of condemnation – Rom. 8:1-2;  You are complete in Christ – Col. 2:9-10;  You are God’s beloved child – John 1:12.

You are SIGNIFICANT!

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On the other hand, maybe you’ve become impressed with your own importance.  Maybe it’s happened gradually without your even becoming aware of it.  Perhaps you’ve even become consumed by it.  Here is a gentle reminder that Mr. OTN is fond of using,  “There is only one God and you are not Him!”

Prayer:

Papa God – Help me to maintain proper balance in my service to you.  Help me not to become “heady” over the victories.  Help me also not to sink back into the old feelings of being “less than” all of the beautiful Christians around me.  Keep my eyes focused on You and Your GREATNESS!  Keep me in this place of being dependent upon you and daily amazed by YOU!  Continue to guide me as I play my part in the greatest story ever told.  YOUR story!

Finally Lord, my prayer is this . . . that if there is anything at all great about me that it be You IN me!

Now that is a heady thought!

Blessings,

My Signature

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Counting Down the Hours!

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I am SO excited.

I just don’t know if I’ll be able to sleep tonight!

Do you have any idea what happens when I don’t get enough sleep?   No, of course you don’t!  I get all emotional and teary and giggly and silly all at the same time.  I don’t function very effectively and I need to be able to function to take in all that this upcoming weekend has to offer!

Mother's Day 201 008

So what is all the excitement about?  This weekend I will be attending my first Allume Conference in Greenville, SC (right down the road from where I now live).  Not only that!  My gal Debbie and her husband John (the ones who bought our old house) are flying in tonight so she can attend the conference with me!

Woot!!!

So what is the Allume Conference all about?

Logan Wolfram, Executive Director and Host of Allume says:

“We desire to increase people’s passion for the power of Jesus to reach others…to equip them with the vehicle of online blogging and social media, to engage them to recognize the power of the voice that they have in that space, and to release them into the world… into that space… and into their communities with a greater passion for the power of Jesus to reach others.
It’s ‘Real Light Living.’ “

In addition to a great statement of purpose this conference will be packed with awesome speakers, individual workshops, opportunities to fellowship with other writers, and (they tell us) gifts galore!  Again . . . Woot!

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I first heard about the conference from Diane at An Extraordinary Day last Spring when she emailed me in response to a question I asked her.  As that email came through my inbox Mr. OTN and I were in the process of planning a trip to Greenville to check on a job opportunity and to see if the city would be a place where we might like to relocate.

                         Me:  “Can you believe it? A Christian bloggers and writer’s conference in Greenville, of all places!”

                        Mr. OTN:  “When is it?”

                        Me:  “In October.”

                        Mr. OTN:  “Book it!”

                         Me:  “What?  How do you know we’ll be living there?”

                         Mr. OTN:  “Book it!” 

I guess I would’ve been making my way across the country to the conference if he hadn’t been offered the job he applied for the on the very same day that he interviewed for it.  Maybe Mr. OTN knew something I didn’t about the direction our lives would take but a Christian blogger’s conference in Greenville was definitely one of the many “signs” that pointed the way toward South Carolina.

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So, the guest room is ready . . . though not decorated exactly the way I want it . . .  but hey, we haven’t even been here for two months.

I’m ready . . . to hug on Deb’s neck and to go to what I believe will be a fabulous conference together!

Mr. OTN is ready  . . . to see his friend John and to hang out and do guy things . . . like watching the Seahawks in our NW/Seahawk themed Bonus Room!

I’m hoping to come back from the weekend with lots of goodness to share with Y’all.

Blessings,

My SignatureMother's Day 201 014

To Curtain or Not to Curtain, That is the Question!

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Somebody help me . . . please!!!

I need advice on what to do in my kitchen now that I’ve taken down the curtains . . . that matched the chandy . . . that I didn’t really like . . .  but almost left in place . . . because I didn’t want to hurt the previous homeowner’s feelings . . . because she is the nicest lady in the world . . .

‘Nuff said, you can read all about that dilemma HERE!

Kitchen Drapes 004These are the curtains I took down from the kitchen windows in my new house.

Just like the old light fixture, they weren’t bad.  In fact, they were kind of cute, just not my style.

Kitchen Window Drapes 003This is the AFTER picture. 

I like the look of the window panes that were once hidden.  I like that more light comes into the room.  I like seeing more of the trees in my back yard.  But does it leave the area above the window looking too stark?  What’s your opinion?  Do you think this space NEEDS curtains?

Kitchen Drapes 003Take another look at another BEFORE

Kitchen Window Drapes 002And another AFTER.

Since I’m no longer living near friends who were always willing to give me opinions I asked Mr. OTN.  He didn’t even notice that I’d taken them down so I’m not sure if he ever really noticed that they were there in the first place!  Okay, so he was eagle-eyed at finding my new chandy in the great sea of chandys at Habitat for Humanity but that doesn’t mean he notices everything that’s going on at home.

My kitchen is a nice sunny yellow color which was professionally painted just a few months ago so I don’t think I’ll paint it for now even though it isn’t the color of my old kitchen.

Here I go again . . . wrestling with what once was . . .

I loved the colors in my old kitchen!  I designed it myself and it was a kitchen I really hated to leave!  You can see that makeover (my most popular post ever) HERE.  So of course I’d love to create the same exact kitchen in my new house.  The problem is that this kitchen has also been recently remodeled so I really can’t justify a complete remodel.  In time I will probably add a taller back splash and do something different with the hood over the range but that’s about it.

spode_blue_italian_regimental_dinner_plate_P0000095583S0001T2So, moving on, my everyday dishes are blue and white Spode Italian which is very pretty with the yellow walls and the golden granite.  So I could go with blue and yellow for my kitchen colors . . .

Blue Toile Drapesvia

. . . and add curtains something like this in blue toile.

Red Toile Drapesvia

I also love the look of red and yellow and I have several red accent pieces so I could do something like this with red toile.

Red Buffalo Check Drapesvia

Or a bolder Buffalo check like this!

Red, blue and yellow kitchenvia

Or I could use all three colors, yellow, red and blue.  In this picture you’ll notice that there are no curtains. Probably because it’s colorful enough without them.

Wiseton Ct Kitchen 1Maybe these photos of the kitchen from the original MLS listing will help you envision better what I am working with . . .

Wiseton Ct Kitchen 2 . . . even though they don’t show much of the windows.  As you can probably tell from my fabric choices, I love French Country kitchens and that is the look I’d like to recreate without getting too busy.

Like I said, I need help and I value your opinions. 

To see more pictures of curtains I’ve pinned to Pinterest to help in this decision making process you can click HERE.  If you see something that you think is an even better choice for my kitchen please, let me know as I’ll take all the input I can get!

Blessings,

Patti

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An Elegant Thrift Store Chandy!

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Thrifted Kitchen Chandy 005“This is a gift we’ve left for you . . . My husband made it himself . . . Please don’t take it down.”

These were the words that sweet Mrs. F., the former owner of our new home, said of the light fixture in the kitchen dining nook on the day of the final walk through.

Having already been on Craigslist searching for chandys I smiled politely, not knowing how to respond and just said, “Thank you.”

Craigslist. Tiffany Lamp & Packing Boxex 002As you can see, this Tiffany style stained glass chandelier is not a bad looking chandelier.  In fact it’s very pretty and, as Mrs. F. pointed out to me, it matched perfectly the bright colors in the kitchen curtains . . .

. . . which I’ve taken down (but more on that later).

The problem is that it’s just not my style.

“What do I DO?” I whined to my friend Debbie.  “Mr. OTN told them we would invite them over once we were settled in!”

“Maybe you could just tell her that since this is such a special piece you’d like to know if they would like it back if you ever decide to change it.”

Debbie had the right answer of course but . . .

I hate this kind of stuff!

I hate making people feel bad!

I hate to seem like an ungrateful receiver of a gift!

Why else did I keep that purple tree made from plastic beads on display in my living room for so long . . . years even?  Because my mom gave it to me and I didn’t want her to feel bad.  One of my friends once commented on it and told me that her mom gifted her with the same tree only she kept hers in the laundry room.  I think that is when my tree found a new place to live.

So maybe I’d just keep the  Tiffany lamp up for awhile . . . at least until after we’d had them over to see how the house looked.

First Thrifted Find - French Chandy 001Then it happened.  

We stopped in at Habitat for Humanity just to browse around and  Mr. OTN spotted this!

The perfect chandy for our space . . . or at least it would be . . . after a little work.

First Thrifted Find - French Chandy 002A little Oil Rubbed Bronze spray paint, a little rewiring by my eagle eyed hubby,

Magnetic crystals 001a few magnetic crystals from Ballard Design (the big splurge), and a set of new drum shades,

Thrifted Kitchen Chandy 015and here is my elegant new kitchen chandy!

Thrifted Kitchen Chandy 009“WHAT?  How could you?”,  you ask. “What about those dear sweet people who sold you the house?  How will they feel?”

Thankfully Mr. OTN came to my rescue . . . not the first time . . . when Mr. F. came by the house to show him something.  I had told him Deb’s advice and he came right out and asked Mr. F. if he ever wanted the light fixture back if we found something that was “more our style” (not exactly Deb’s words).  Mr. F. assured him that we could keep it as it was one of his first stained glass pieces and he didn’t feel that it was that well done.

Thrifted Kitchen Chandy 010Whew!  Problem solved!  Can you believe I’m such a chicken when it comes to things like that?  Thankfully Mr. OTN has an easier time being direct!  In fact, once when my mom gave him a set of brightly colored paper mache’ fish for Christmas he had no problem returning them to the store and buying what HE wanted instead.  But that’s a whole ‘nother story!

Thrifted Kitchen Chandy 008I love the look of my new chandy hanging in the kitchen dining nook.

Thrifted Kitchen Chandy 006I love the curviness of it’s arms and the contrast of the sparkling crystals against the dark oil rubbed bronze.Thrifted Kitchen Chandy 016I love the way the crystals reflect light around the room when the morning sun shines through the windows.

Thrifted Kitchen Chandy 001I love having a husband who is strong when I am weak and on multiple occasions has bailed me out!  The reverse is also true too as I am often strong where he is weak . . . so we make a pretty good team.

The whole kitchen curtain dilemma is next on my agenda but I’ll save that for another post when I’ll be back seeking your advice.  Until then . . .

Blessings,

My Signature

P.S. By the way, my mom normally had very good taste. I never could figure out the purple beaded tree or paper mache’ fish though. LOL!
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Freedom Friday – On Friendship With God

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She’s baaaacccck . . . Oh nooo . . . poor Mr. OTN!

Last night when Mr. OTN came home from working another 12-hour day of kicking disease’s hiney and taking names, we sat down to dinner and I launched right into a review of my exciting day:

*I talked to the grass man and we need to put flags on all of the sprinkler heads before they come out to treat and re-seed the grass.

*I talked to the floor man and he will be coming on Tuesday morning to bring sample colors for us to pick from for refinishing the hardwood floors.  By the way, we will need to make sure all of our furniture is moved off the hardwoods (never mind that we just moved everything in) before he arrives!

*I talked to a nice man at Home Depot who helped me find the perfect sized sheet metal screws that I needed to finish putting together the new living room end tables.

*And oh yes, my chandelier crystals came in the mail – WOOT! – to dress up my thrifted kitchen chandy.

 I ended this one way discourse by telling him that it had been a very good day.

Mr. OTN listened to the best of his ability (too exhausted to comment) and then retired to the den to watch a few minutes of Thursday night football and the news (simultaneously) before retiring to bed.

As I picked up the dinner dishes I mulled over the significance of what had just happened.  Laying my work aside I went into the den and asked him, “Can you tell I’m feeling happier?  Did you notice that I’m more talkative then I’ve been in weeks (it’s a fact that words tend to bubble out of my mouth when I’m feeling happy)?  I think the old Patti is back!  Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”

He says it’s a good thing.

16-My backyard 015FREEDOM FRIDAY – The name of a new devotional, emotional, spiritual and sometimes hysterical series that I will be sharing on occasional Fridays, in addition to my regular Old Things New home decor posts.

In my last Freedom Friday post I spoke about times of Feeling Lonely now that we are far away from the place we once called home.  Afterwards, I was so touched by your encouraging comments on this blog, Facebook and via email.  Thank you SO much!  I was also saddened for those of you who experience feelings of loneliness yourselves (I’ll have more for you at the end of this post).

 In that post I also spoke about spending time drawing nearer to God and depending more upon Him to meet my need for friendship.  I shared that in my quiet time with Him I felt as if He was saying to me that He wanted me to “know and be known” by Him in a deeper way.

20-My backyard 006It is getting better indeed as I become more settled into my new home and get to know my way around the community.  We’ve made a decision to settle in for a little (or maybe long) stay at a local cathedral church.  Sorry, I couldn’t help that strike-through . . . the churches here are just so BIG!  I’m NOT yet feeling led to join any small groups within the church or to get busy volunteering right away (I’m too busy talking to grass men and floor men).  I know that could be construed as isolating (a big no-no in Freedom Session) but right now I am enjoying cocooning (something I also spoke about in my last post), drawing nearer to God and spending some very deliberate time seeking His presence.

I’m reading a great book by Dutch Sheets called Pleasure of His Company: A Journey to Intimate Friendship With God.  In Chapter 11, The Spoiler, he makes reference to a man by the name of Obed-Edom who (back in Old Testament days) had the privilege of hosting the ark of the covenant (where God’s presence dwelt) in his home (probably on the screened porch), at King David’s request.  During that time of living in the midst of God’s presence he and his household were blessed in every way and when, at the end of three months, David decided to move the ark to Jerusalem, Obed-Edom packed up and moved his whole household right along with it!  He had become spoiled, or “ruined” for God’s presence.

13-My backyard 021Thankfully we no longer need a holy-of-holies to experience God’s presence as He dwells within each Christ follower in the person of the Holy Spirit.

Tell me, how often do you really stop and think about the fact that His presence is right there with you?  Right there . . . wherever you are.  That’s awesome!

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It is also awesome to know that God desires friendship with us.  In fact, that is what He created us for! 

So does He want to be a casual acquaintance type of friend?  No.

Does He want to be a best friend type of friend?  Yes.

For the most part I try to live an authentic life before others but that doesn’t mean baring everything to everybody!  I’ve been fortunate enough to have a few very close friends whom I’ve allowed to see deeper into the real me.  My girls and I have often become quite vulnerable as we’ve opened our hearts to each other.  We’ve entrusted ourselves to one another and in doing so our friendships have grown stronger.  This is the kind of relationship that God desires with us . . . but even more so!

14-My backyard 019In studying about more intimate friendship with God I decided to do a little Obed-Edom challenge to myself.  A couple of weeks ago I dedicated myself to daily seeking God for the next three months.  This doesn’t mean picking up my Bible, doing a daily Bible reading, journaling out a quick response and going my way.  What this means to me is really seeking Him, inviting Him into my space and asking Him to reveal Himself to me.  Then I wait . . . and I listen, inclining my ear toward God, leaning in close to hear what He wants to say to me.  I’m enjoying God’s presence in a new way right HERE . . . on my own screened porch.

The Porch is my Happy Place 001

In this special place I close my eyes and wait for Him.

And He is delighted to reveal Himself to me.

01-My backyard 039Having been very active (translate – BUSY) in Freedom Session for the past four years I realize what a luxury it is to have this time of “cocooning”, with no obligations other than home and family, until the time that we know what God has next for us.

17-My backyard 009I wonder, will this time change me?  Will I, like Obed-Edom, be ruined for God’s presence?  I hope so.  I hope that when we are ready to emerge from our cocoon, nourished, refreshed, and strengthened, we will be different . . .  transformed . . .  and more ready than ever to give back to others from the depths of what God has given us.

02-My backyard 037Now, back to those of you who are still feeling alone and lonely. I hurt for you, I really do, because I still have times of feeling lonely too.  But you know what?  One of the lessons Freedom Session teaches is that there is no excuse for loneliness and that there is actually a cure!  Do you want to know what it is?  It is doing something for someone else.  Even during this cocoon time, our time off from a very demanding ministry, I’m asking God to make me a light to the community around me.  I’m asking Him for words to say to touch the heart of each person I come in contact with . . . including the grass man and the floor man and the hardware store man.  I’m asking Him to make my life a blessing to those around me, especially my husband, who works so hard to provide for his family and gives so much of himself to others.

10-My backyard 026So, I want to encourage you, first of all, to begin actively seeking God’s presence and building a best friend relationship with Him.  Maybe you’ll even want to join me in the Obed-Edom challenge and see if it will change the way you feel.  Take some time to go deeper with Him.  Lean into Him, draw strength from Him and bless Him back with praise and worship.  Next if you are lonely stop looking for someone to be YOUR friend and BE a friend to someone else!  Start small.  Write notes of encouragement to others.  Leave comments on people’s Facebook posts or on the blogs you follow (I have received SO much encouragement myself that way).  Become a secret giver of little gifts to others.  Make eye contact and smile at every person who comes your way (unless you live in NYC – just kidding).  You can even ask God if He will give you a word directly from His heart to share with someone who needs encouragement.  I promise you that YOU will be the one who benefits most from encouraging others. 

As a bonus, from the mouth of Mr. OTN, here is a medical fact for you to ponder:  Did you know that smiling releases endorphins that cause you to feel better?  So smile . . . smile a LOT!  If you are alone smile at yourself in the mirror!  You’ll not only begin to feel better but you’ll look a whole lot nicer too!

18-My backyard 008 The Bible says that Abraham entrusted himself to God and that living a faithful life earned him the title of “God’s friend.” James 2:23 The Voice

The Bible says that the reason we love God is because He first loved us.  1 John 4:19 The Voice

The Bible says, “You direct me on the path that leads to a beautiful life.
    As I walk with You, the pleasures are never-ending,
    and I know true joy and contentment.  Psalm 16:11 The Voice

The Porch is my Happy Place 004

PRAYER: 

 Father God, thank you that because of Jesus (and certainly not my own righteousness) you have made me worthy of being called your friend.  Thank you that you actually desire my friendship and that I can talk to you about anything . . . because you already know everything . . and yet love me anyway.  May it not always be about me talking . . . bubbling forth with words of my own . . . but may our friendship be mutually beneficial.  Teach me the art of listening to you.  May our friendship be a blessing to YOU!  Thank you that You are always with me, that you never leave me or forsake me.  Thank you that the life you offer is a beautiful life filled with true joy and contentment.  Amen.

Blessings,

My Signature

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